BAD NEWS
Thank you so much Polar Bear and Butterflies for your encouragement and support! It really, really means a lot to me. Thank you!
I don't have a rash or the same headache sensations. So, it's really good.
My brother & sister lost their baby. Well, it didn't fertilize correctly so there was no baby but there were parts of fertilization, like a placenta cord. I've never heard of that before. We just found out tonight. My brother is upset. My sister in law is disappointed but more hopeful and "together" than I expected. Al & I are pretty upset.
My grandma is doing better. She will probably go back to her home with extra services in about a month. My mom got the norwalk virus from the hospital and she's recovering. It sounds nasty. So, it's just my aunt and uncle with my grandma.
I was sick today with heat related sickness. Headache, nausea, dizziness, confusion, leg and arm cramps. Tonight it should be cooler. There's something wrong with our a/c. And we have to go to a separate office for a/c at work so I was only working in the afternoons in air conditinoning. I think the heat got to me.
Al & I got into a fight about it. He baisically knows that I'm sensitive to the heat and that our a/c is broken and I don't have a/c in my regular office but he never gave my health a second thought over the last couple of days of this heat wave. He was told on Sunday that the a/c company would call him to make an appointment but he never followed up with them. On Tuesday I told him that I assumed since he was HOME ALL day on Monday that he would be proactive and call them. I did mention on Monday...oh great, then maybe the a/c people can come by to fix it. He said they never called back so I thought he must have called them but they didn't return his call yet. Well, Tuesday night I found out he didn't call them at all. He was just waiting for them because the a/c guy said he'd ask his manager to call him on Sunday. Maybe I'm overreacting. But, I was sick today because we have no a/c working at home or in my office. And Al didn't give my health a second thought during the last couple of days when Monday until today has been extremely hot with temperatures with humidex reaching 40C. I'm so hurt by his selfishness. I feel so angry at him. I wonder for the first time if our marriage is falling apart. How could he not even think of me and my health? Like he doesn't care? That is what it feels like to me. I know he cares about me but it hurts that he didn't even think about me in the last couple days. I feel such an anger and hatred rising up in me. Hatred?! Isn't that so weird? The man I love but I feel such an anger, rage and disgust towards him. I feel so separated from him. Everyone thinks our marriage is so great but I feel like it is falling apart.
I don't have a rash or the same headache sensations. So, it's really good.
My brother & sister lost their baby. Well, it didn't fertilize correctly so there was no baby but there were parts of fertilization, like a placenta cord. I've never heard of that before. We just found out tonight. My brother is upset. My sister in law is disappointed but more hopeful and "together" than I expected. Al & I are pretty upset.
My grandma is doing better. She will probably go back to her home with extra services in about a month. My mom got the norwalk virus from the hospital and she's recovering. It sounds nasty. So, it's just my aunt and uncle with my grandma.
I was sick today with heat related sickness. Headache, nausea, dizziness, confusion, leg and arm cramps. Tonight it should be cooler. There's something wrong with our a/c. And we have to go to a separate office for a/c at work so I was only working in the afternoons in air conditinoning. I think the heat got to me.
Al & I got into a fight about it. He baisically knows that I'm sensitive to the heat and that our a/c is broken and I don't have a/c in my regular office but he never gave my health a second thought over the last couple of days of this heat wave. He was told on Sunday that the a/c company would call him to make an appointment but he never followed up with them. On Tuesday I told him that I assumed since he was HOME ALL day on Monday that he would be proactive and call them. I did mention on Monday...oh great, then maybe the a/c people can come by to fix it. He said they never called back so I thought he must have called them but they didn't return his call yet. Well, Tuesday night I found out he didn't call them at all. He was just waiting for them because the a/c guy said he'd ask his manager to call him on Sunday. Maybe I'm overreacting. But, I was sick today because we have no a/c working at home or in my office. And Al didn't give my health a second thought during the last couple of days when Monday until today has been extremely hot with temperatures with humidex reaching 40C. I'm so hurt by his selfishness. I feel so angry at him. I wonder for the first time if our marriage is falling apart. How could he not even think of me and my health? Like he doesn't care? That is what it feels like to me. I know he cares about me but it hurts that he didn't even think about me in the last couple days. I feel such an anger and hatred rising up in me. Hatred?! Isn't that so weird? The man I love but I feel such an anger, rage and disgust towards him. I feel so separated from him. Everyone thinks our marriage is so great but I feel like it is falling apart.
4 Comments:
At 11:00 p.m.,
butterflies said…
Oh sweetie,I feel your anger and pain.Men can be so insensitive sometimes.Im sure you are feeling rough with the heat and the aircon not working! Just try and get yourself feeling better and dont take much notice of the man.Keep YOU secure and happy and other things can wait til your strong enough to deal with them.Take care
At 9:29 a.m.,
Anonymous said…
It's great that you're grandmother is able to head home and that there are services to help her keep her independence. Also, yours sounds like a close-knit family, which I think is special these days.
It's a shame about the loss of the baby, but these things do happen and it sounds as if your sister-in-law is handling things OK.
I agree with Butterflies. Men tend not to be great caretakers. Although it might feel hurtful, I very much doubt that Al's intent was to cause you discomfort or to leave you feeling let down.
If you can, try to step back from the feelings you have and try to remember all the ways Al does help out and care for you.
:-)
At 3:06 p.m.,
Polar Bear said…
Sorry to hear about the loss of the baby.
I don't function well in hot temperatures as well. So I understand the stress and pressure you must have been under. Just hang in there.
Take care
Polar B
At 8:26 p.m.,
Yuki said…
Thank you so very much for your encouragement and wise words which I take to heart!
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